Hello, Readers. My name is [redacted] and I'm an insomniac.
It's 2am here, and yet ... not sleepy. Generally, this is because I can sleep in as late as I want now that it's officially summer vacation, but mostly it's nerves tonight.
Tomorrow I see my insides. My doctor wants an ultrasound of my ovaries. And while I'll also get the blood test done, if there are cysts tomorrow, it means PCOS. Which really kind of sucks. I mean, it's not the end of the world. But it means permanent changes. And that blows.
In hilarious news, when I scheduled the ultrasound I made a huge ass of myself. I called the handy dandy number to the imaging department or whatever they're called, and indicated I need a pelvic ultrasound. The woman on the other end said, "Oh, so you're pregnant?" I shouldn't have been caught off guard -- that's the most common reason a woman would have an ultrasound. But I was a little shocked and it took me a second to respond. And when she asked again, "For pregnancy?" Instead of saying, "No, they think I have PCOS," I instead blurted out, "I'd better NOT be pregnant." What can I say? Five gets worried when she's not on her birth control pills, even when we're safe.
I don't think this woman was amused.
Anyway, at 1:30pm today (because it is past midnight, after all) I will see my ovaries. And I'll have one more clue in the puzzle of WTF is wrong with me.
Finally: is it in poor taste to name at least one of my ovaries "Lumpy" if I have cysts?
1 week ago